How to Succeed in Business Without Really Crying

How to Succeed in Business Without Really Crying

Carol Leifer

Language: English

Pages: 240

ISBN: 159474677X

Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub

For many years, television comedy was an exclusive all boys’ club—until a brilliant comedian named Carol Leifer came along, blazing a trail for funny women everywhere. From Late Night with David Letterman and Saturday Night Live to Seinfeld, The Ellen Show, and Modern Family, Carol has written for and/or performed on some of the best TV comedies of all time.
This hilarious collection of essays charts her extraordinary three-decade journey through show business, illuminating her many triumphs and some missteps along the way—and offering valuable lessons for women and men in any profession. Part memoir, part guide to life, and all incredibly funny, How to Succeed in Business without Really Crying offers tips and tricks for getting ahead, finding your way, and opening locked doors—even if you have to use a sledgehammer.

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every week they put me on a scale used to weigh livestock. Mom? You there …?”) In the late eighties I let myself go, weighing in at one hundred and fifty-nine pounds (oh, the relief of not hitting one-six-o on that scale!). And it was nothing short of a nightmare, the six months I lumbered around at that tonnage. It culminated one night at the Improv, where I removed my sweater midset and a heckler yelled out from the audience, “Sooie!!!!!” It was one of my worst moments ever as a stand-up, and

meeting, people, not a 5K race.) Whatever your calling, the real test of your career longevity will come during the valleys. How will you rally and pick yourself up during those downtimes? That’s the true challenge. In 1989, I was deep in the valley. My stand-up bookings were going from bad to worse. My agency couldn’t even get me arrested. (This was back when an arrest didn’t get you the cover of People and a series deal.) It can happen with talent agencies. They pay lots of attention to you

abovementioned classic “Marble Rye” episode. So whatever business you’re in, always keep a friendly ear out for a random pitch that you can spin into something viable. As my mother (and many other Jewish women) used to say, “You never know …” Side note: As a souvenir from that episode, I got to keep the empty industrial-size can of Beef-a-Reeno (Chef Boyardee wouldn’t grant us permission to use the name Beef-a-Roni) that Kramer’s horse Rusty devoured. I have few regrets in life, but one is that

to see me, and I shared the story with him and my mom of how Jerry had graciously lent me a ride. (The folks always ate the show biz stuff up with a spoon!) When I left the hospital that night with my mom, we were both very encouraged by my dad’s progress. The next morning, I arrived at the hospital in an upbeat mood. I ran into the nurse and asked how my father was doing. “Oh, not too good this morning,” she said. “We’ve definitely taken a step backward.” “Oh, you’re kidding,” I replied

producers, it’s a distant memory as I leave the lot.” Bryan told me that when his agent would call with a booking, many times he’d have to remind his client which part he had landed. Knowing that, and witnessing the amazing career Bryan has had since the Seinfeld days, why would you even wonder at it? He focused on what was important—the work. Swim or die. Good advice for sharks, and for anyone who has to be in the water with them. Bryan Cranston presents me with my Emmy nomination certificate

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