Painfully Gross Jokes, Volume 8

Painfully Gross Jokes, Volume 8

Julius Alvin

Language: English

Pages: 161

ISBN: 2:00263396

Format: PDF / Kindle (mobi) / ePub

Synopsis from Amazon: A collection of way out humor, celebrity jabs, and outrageous putdowns.

A Sample:

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she sits on your face, you can't hear the stereo . What's fast talking? A husband coming home from a date at 3:00 A.M . and convincing his wife his breath smellsĀ· because he had tuna for dinner. I A guy was out on a date with a girl, and the going got hot and heavy. The guy worked his hand into her pants, and she was moaning with pleasure when suddenly she grunted in pain. "Hey," she complained. "Take that ring off. It's hurting me." The guy replied, "That's no ring- it's my wristwatch ." 131

we'll be rebuilding the house exactly as it was before." The businessman thought for a moment, then said, "In that case, I want you to cancel the policy on roy wife." Why is an Italian with a monkey like a hooker? They're both organ grinders. If you serve a cheesecake with a single cherry on top, who gets the cherry? The guy who takes the first piece. 137 ' JULIUS ALVIN Did you hear about the wife who got a postcard from her husband, who was on a business trip? It read, "Having a

JAP replied, "I 'm looking for a new dishwasher." "What happened to your old one?" "I divorced him last month." Why did the Mississippi State Zoo hire its first black keeper? The gorilla needed blood transfusions. 17 JULIUS ALVIN Why did the Polack think he was built upside down? Because his nose ran and his feet smelled. Did you hear about the earthquake that hit Warsaw, Poland? ' - 1t caused $20 million in improvements. , ).. Did you hear about the new Russian KGB amusement park? When

girl friend has VD? She stops into the drugstore for prescription underwear. How can you tell if you're in a tough neighborhood? The gun shops have back-to-school sales. How can you tell your kid's going to a tough school? They frisk your kid for weapons- if he doesn't have one, they give him one. "" 144 PAINFUUY GROSS JOKES How can you tell your kid's in a tough school? In art class, they strip the teacher. How can you tell your kid's in a tough school? There's a bail bondsman working in

to get the hang of it. An hour later, the rabbi was listening when a parishioner came into the confessional and said, "Father, I have sinned. I have had sexual intercourse with a married man four times. I am very sorry for this sin ." 96 - ---,. PAINFULLY GROSS JOKES The priest said, "Your sin is a serious one, my dear. But God forgives you, if you repent. Either say 40 Hail Marys or put $2 in the poorbox." The next woman carne in and said, "Father, I have sinned. I am not married, but I

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